I hate writing. I should do an audio post, wait.. isn’t that like a podcast sort of thing? I don’t like writing, you can’t hear the tones in my voice and most importantly, you can’t here the scarcasm. Sucks.
Anyhow, on to my rant. That seems to be all I’m doing these days. But really, I can’t help it. My life is sooo bitter right now it is definitely one of the low points in my life. Moving away from home seemed so exciting at first but now I wish I could just stay there. I never realized that how stressful and so lonely life can be. I leanrt that friends are not really friends. Or maybe I just haven’t found the true friends sort of type yet.. I don’t like this feeling anymore. Where you talk to someone because you want to get something, friends feel so fake. I want to scream. Now that I’ve alienated myself, loneliness is coming back to haunt me. You know? I’ve always thought I coped well with loneliness, I had friends but I’ve never really thought that I needed anymore. Still don’t, but it’s lonely. I miss the times when we used to laugh and talk about pointless things, how we used to make.. just have fun doing stupid things.
I know compared to a lot of people my life is good. My parents give me money, I get to buy almost whatever I want, I don’t have to worry about living costs. But, I just can’t see really friends. I think that is really really sad for the first time in my life. At the moment I’m soo tired, mentally. I’ve never thought uni was going to make me feel this way. If I don’t sink into depression and end up with suicide. I am definitely going to end up as a better person.
And why doesn’t this thing has spell check..
